我的“婆婆”

乌托邦

我的“婆婆”
    一次很偶然的机会，我代替我们班的志愿者小组长去开会，就在当时报名参加了“长者服务队”。刚接到任务的时候很兴奋，就接了个小组长来当当；想着：这样的人情化的志愿者绝对比广州图书馆好玩。
    我们这组的服务对象是位67岁的婆婆，与丈夫离婚多年，但仍然住在同一房子里。婆婆有个小儿子早年得了怪病，又因没钱得不到及时的治疗，夭折了。还有个女儿，二十多岁，有了男朋友但未成婚也离她而去。每当讲到女儿，婆婆就特别激动。痛苦不已，流泪不止。同住的还有一个四十岁但仍未聚妻的大儿子，在做保安，工资不高，现有个离过婚的女朋友，一起搬出去住了，听说两人对老人都不太好。家里的条件也很差，光线不足，很昏暗，特别是婆婆的房间，没有窗户，空气不流通，白天与黑夜一样添黑。
　　我们是帮穷学生，物质上也帮不上什么忙，所以我们仅能提供的服务，也就是陪婆婆聊聊天，逛逛街。虽然我们做不了什么，但婆婆还是很欢迎我们的到来，感激中带有期盼。
    由于各种原因，要么是婆婆没空，要么是我们抽不出时间，一个多月来，我们只是去过三次，但令人欣慰的是，每一次，婆婆的情绪都有转变，记得初访时，负责人刚说完我们的来历和主要目的，婆婆就已经失声哭述起来，那痛苦至极的表情让我手足失措。之后，我第一次带着其他两名志愿者再次拜访婆婆时，刚坐下，婆婆又不能自己的哭述起来，由于比较激动，再加上她浓重的广西口音，话语变得很模糊，实在是听不明白。我们能做的只是握着她的手轻拍她的肩膀，“告拆”她：我们在听，还有我们在关心你！同时，一有机会，就引开她的注意，说些积极的并尽量避免敏感的字眼。两个多钟里，绝大部分是婆婆在痛哭，这就是我们面临的最大问题，也是一项挑战。
    第二次，有了头次经验，我们一开始就“主动出击”，和婆婆话家常，以免她又“触景生情”。闲聊间，我们可以看出，其实婆婆和一般老年人一样，都会有些小病小痛，也会拜神但她很开明，一点也不迷信，还教导我们“学知识很重要”。但她不喜欢参加社区的集体活动，也很少和人交流。太多的伤心往事侵蚀着她的心灵，要么封闭自己，要么暴发出来。两个小时下来，虽然婆婆不时地还会哭，但已经能控制住，容易平静下来了。
    隔了两个星期，我们才去第三次，这次婆婆的精神明显好了很多，只是感冒留下的咳嗽还在继续。我们还担心会因为长时间没见，婆婆会对我们生疏，然而这是多虑了。而且最令人惊喜的是，当婆婆再次说起儿子女儿老公房子时，居然能平静地叙说。最后婆婆还主动提出带我们去“动感地带”手机专卖店，介绍我去看看特价手机。多么可爱的婆婆啊，如此“与时俱进”实在难得！
    我们除了看到婆婆有令人欣慰的变化，连她的大儿子，似乎也变得“孝顺”多了。他给了部手机婆婆，还教她如何打电话又如何接听，从和婆婆的交谈中，可以看出婆婆对大儿子的行支有惊更有喜，毕竟是骨肉亲情，真正能让婆婆更快乐的面对生活的，应该还是这位大儿子了……
　　作为小组组长，我认真检讨了一下，在服务时间安排和人员分配上，我做得非常不好，至今只去服务过三次，只有四五个志愿者组员参加过服务。而且和组员之间的交流也甚少。以后的安排，我们不会和婆婆说“我们要停止服务”，只要要婆婆空闲，我们也有时间，就可以去拜访她，像拜访一个朋友，一个亲人。不过我们每个星期都会和她联系，大概了解一下婆婆的近况。
05计机4班   李思斯

小面条

编号：077159
名字：小面条
我认领这篇文章翻译啦~~~

小面条

[这个贴子最后由小面条在 2007/07/22 00:33am 第 2 次编辑]

My “grandma”
By an accidental chance, I took the place of our volunteer group leader to hold a group meeting. That was when I joined in the “Service Group for the old”. Out of excitement, I asked to be the group leader, thinking it must be much more enjoyable than being in the Guangzhou Library!
Our group is responsible to an old woman who is 67 years old. She got divorced with her husband long ago but she still hasn';t had the chance to move out of this old, stuffy small house. We all called her “Grandma”. “Grandma” has three children----a daughter and two sons. Her younger son died young because of the lack of money to save him from his bad illness. Her daughter, who is at her twenties, was abandoned by her boyfriend before marriage. When it came to her daughter , “Grandma” could not help crying. Her older son is at his forties, but he still hasn’t been married yet. He is now doing a job of safeguard with low income. His present girlfriend is a woman who once got divorced. They moved into the same house just a few months ago. It’s said that they treated “Grandma” badly. The living condition of “Grandma” is quite bad. Poor light shines into her dark, stuffy house. In her bedroom, you can not even find a single window at all! No wind, no light. Although it is in the morning, it is as dark as in the evening.
We are just a group of poor students. So we can’t help her much materially. The only service we could offer her was to talk and go shopping with her. Although we couldn’t do much to help her, she still welcomed us. We could tell that she was not only grateful but also looking forward to our visit.
Because of different reasons, we have just been to her house three times since last month. But we are happy to see that every time we went to visit her, “Grandma” had changed little by little. The first time we went to see her, “Grandma” began crying as soon as the man in charge finished his introduction. The painful expression on her face made me perplexed! A few days later when I brought two other volunteers with me to visit her for the first time, “Grandma” could do nothing but crying. Since she narrated her story with emotion and with a strong Guangxi accent, we could hardly figure out what she was saying. The only thing we could do was to pat her shoulders showing her that we were listening to her and we cared about her.Once we got the chance, we would try our best to distract her from her painful memories by telling her some optimistic things. But during the visit, most of the two hours was still spent on crying by “Grandma”. This was the biggest problem we faced, but it was also the biggest challenge.
On the second visit, we were more experienced due to the first visit. So we took the initiative. We talked about the homely things with “Grandma”, trying to avoid making her think of the sad past. Just like other old people, “Grandma” had some indisposition. She believed in god but she was not superstitious. Sometimes she even told us that knowledge was very important. But she didn’t like community activities and she seldom communicated with others. She was burdened by her sad past which devoured her soul bit by bit. To release herself, she would either keep herself away from others, or burst out! In two hours’ conversation, although she would still cry sometimes, she was able to control her emotion and it was much easier for her to calm down.   
It was two weeks later that we went to see her for the third time. On the way to her home, we were worried about that whether it would be a little strange for “Grandma” to see us again after a long time’s separation. But this thought turned out to be unnecessary. When we saw her, we found her much hearty this time. But she was still coughing due to the cold she had had before. To our surprise, when it came to her sad past this time, “Grandma” could narrate it much calmly. At last she even asked to bring us to the cell phone monopolistic shops, showing us the cell phones on sale. What a lovely old woman!
The great change of “Grandma” was not the only thing that made us happy. The attitude of her older son towards his mother had also changed a lot. He bought “Grandma” a cell phone and even taught her how to use it. From the conversation with “Grandma”, we could tell that she was not only happy but also surprised by her son’s change. After all they two belonged to the same family. He was the only person that could really make “Grandma” happy again.
As the group leader, I did a self-criticism. I admitted that I did a bad job on the distribution of time and staff. Up till now, we have offered “Grandma” service only three times. And there are only 4 or 5 volunteers having taken part in the service activities. Besides, I found there was little communication among the group members.In the following days, we will not say Good bye to our “Grandma”. Instead, as long as both “Grandma” and we volunteers have spare time, we will go to visit our “Grandma” immediately as to visit a friend or a family member. And we will contact our “Grandma” once a week, making sure she is having a good life and will have!

用了一天翻译的… 正在修改中~ 请大家多多指教~!